Saturday, April 26, 2008

The Prophecy Has Been Fulfilled!

Praise unto the Flying Spaghetti Monster, and unto his mortal prophet, Bobby Henderson, for they have truly seen the light! With their infinite wisdom, they have told us many times before that global warming is caused by a dangerous undersupply of pirates. And yet you heretics scoffed, dismissing their divine foresight, adamant that there could be no such relationship. In your folly, you laughed at the prophet and our Noodley Master from Above the Mountain, Midgits, and Trees, denying their message of love and sauciness. Well, the time for your ignorance to be exposed is nigh! Behold!

It is perfectly clear from this that sudden growths in the pirate population helped to decrease global warming, and when they departed, global warming increased, just as the Great Bobby Henderson predicted! Repent now! Beg Bobby Henderson for forgiveness! The evidence of his prophetic ability is undeniable, and if you refuse to admit as much, you simply refuse to believe what is self-evidently true! I pity those of you to stubborn and close-minded to accept the obvious reality of this situation. For the rest of you, our beer volcano and stripper factory await!

Edit: On a related note, non-believers really are fools, aren't they? LOL!

1 comment:

Asylum Seeker said...

I agree with what I have just said.

Also: fruitcake.