Sunday, April 27, 2008

In Memoriam: Week of April 20 to April 26

Insanity of the Day: This one is a little too subtle for me...but I think it is implying that the justice system is somehow prejudiced. Who knew?

Wisdom from the Bowels of the Abyss: "So, this one time, during the Christmas season, I was doing my Christmas shopping, and was well along on my list, feeling all holly and jolly, when suddenly...I saw it. I felt....I felt so...violated. It was a sign that stood, towering above the K-Mart, looming like a Jolly Roger, declaring war against all that we hold near and dear to our hearts. In big, blood-red letters, it shrieked out to helpless customers 'Happy Holidays', a statement so vulgar, so cruel, so sadistic in its tacit dismissal of the existence of Christmas, that it is practically smacking Jesus in the face everytime that the phrase is uttered. I begged the manager to take it down, telling him how offensive it was. I was on the verge of tears...but he would not budge. He refused to acknowledge how heartless and destructive his Godless banner was...refused to see how much pain and anguish he was causing to innocent children who had the misfortune of seeing that horrible phrase, and have their entire holiday ruined by the hatred and intolerance behind such a declaration.And that is why it was justified homicide, your honor."

-Bill O' Reilly, after taking the concept of a culture war too literally.

Poll: If you could offer up an innocent child as a blood sacrifice to the forgotten gods of the darkened upper echelons of reality, would you?

No. Unless it was that annoying neighbor kid.
1 (100%) [All me! What a disturbingly masturbatory process I have going on here...]
Yes, as long as the god offered good healthcare.
0 (0%)
Yes, for any reason, any time, anywhere. Let me at 'em.
0 (0%)
No. Because I am afraid of being arrested.
0 (0%)

Blog Description: Violating your basic human rights, for fun and profit.

Profile: He who was determined by the prophecy to bring upon the land a temporary peace in a time of relatively less peace, only to later wreak havoc, overthrow empires, eat kittens, and have promiscuous sex with naive young altar boys. And the cheese...oh, the horrible things that will occur involving cheese...

Until that bleak point in the not too distant future, the comparatively young Asylum Seeker entertains himself with doodling apocalyptic landscapes, laughing diabolically atop burning buildings, and plotting assassinations for the lulz.

Currently trying to hide his cocaine stash within the hollowed out corpse of a transvetite hooker. Mood: paranoid.

Location: Suicide Flats, Utah

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